It was one of the first nice days of spring this year, everyone decided to go up to this kids cabin in the Poconos. We get up there and start cooking up food while simultaneously slamming Natty Ice and PBR, and by the time nine-o-clock rolls around all the girls show up and I’m covered in ketchup.
The girls somehow tricked me into taking shots of Nikolai, and after this we’re sitting on the front deck and I realize things are looking kinda shaky. It was really hot but I was having cold sweats and salivating. I figured it would be worse to get up and run down the deck in front of everyone, so I flop my head on the front railing and projectile vomit without moving an inch. About five minutes later, my friend comes outside to get something from his car and screams.
“What the fucks all over my car and what’s all over my seat?!”
I had completely gapped about 4 feet of air onto this kids car and sunroof with the senseless fury of hotdogs, brewdogs and vodka. It was kind of funny then.
–18 y/o male from Philly, PA